


Knives can't heal our broken hearts

by Diamondisbackbitch



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Human Disaster Alexander Hamilton, I know, I might be slightly obsessed with John Laurens having a happy and loving family, John Laurens is a great father, Lams - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slavery, Unusual for me, in a historical context, not sexualized
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2019-10-26 01:59:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17736860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diamondisbackbitch/pseuds/Diamondisbackbitch
Summary: America didn't just win freedom from Britain, they full on took them over. Taking over their trade routes, their money, and a select few... 'political prisoners' to make sure they don't try anything. Mostly including high ranking royalty and military intelligence officers.Not everyone agrees with this solution





	1. Chapter 1

"Call." Madison glanced dow at his cards, but kept his face casual.

Alexander nodded. "Call. Looks like you're out of luck Thomas." He smirked at Jefferson's sparse stack of coins in front of him. Not nearly enough to make call. 

Jefferson huffed, straightening his jacket. "I don't suppose you gentlemen could come to an agreement with me? Perhaps you'd find yourself interested in something other than my money?" He inquired.

"Better be good, Thomas." Alexander rolled his eyes. The Virginian was always trying to cheat his way out of situations like this. "We're not letting you off the hook this time."

"Of course it will be, who do you think I am, Alexander?" Jefferson motioned one of his household forward. "Maria, go find John, will you? And his papers as well. They're in my desk. The call is three hundred, correct? Well how about my fifty plus a slave worth at least a thousand and we call it an all in? Unless of course, you disagree with the morality of that as well, Alexander?"

Hamilton frowned. "Bet with what you like. It's your loss." He mumbled. Thomas would always be an ass, what did he care? Madison always won anyway and he had nothing but a pair of queens. He watched as Jefferson placed his remaining money and the deed to his slave in the pile. "All in." He said, shoving his stacks of coins in as well.

"I fold." Madison shook his head. "Sorry boys, but I gotta cut my losses and hope the missus won't be too upset when I get home."

Jefferson nodded. "Well then Alexander, read them and weep." He smirked, laying down his cards. "Pair of Jacks."

"Pair of Queens." Alexander grinned. "Suck on that, Jefferson."

"You've got me beat I suppose." Jefferson smirked. "I wonder what your political party will think of you owning a slave now? After all, you're one of the most profound speakers against such a thing."

Hamilton's smile dropped. "You tricky bastard. Well fine, I'll free him then. You can't stop me from that."

Jefferson grinned wider as John was brought into the room. "Meet John Laurens. He was an army strategist for the British. Led entire battalions into battle. Killed a whole lot of American people. But of course, no one will mind him being set lose in America. The country he worked so hard to destroy."

John Laurens. Alexander glared at the man he fucking recognized. The man he'd watched gun down his friends. Watched destroy entire towns with an army behind him. He growled, walking over to him and forcing John to look him in the face. "Do you know who I am? Do you recognize me?"

"No sir." Came the soft reply. His voice was... younger than Alex had expected. Almost innocent. "I'm afraid I do not sir."

"You'll be calling him master, actually." Thomas interrupted. "Well Alex, good luck. Unless you feel like giving him back and I'll forget the whole affair."

Alexander growled. "And leave him with you? I know how you treat slaves, Jefferson. I wouldn't wish that on anyone," He sighed. "Not even him."

X X X X X X X X X X

Alex could've kicked himself. How did he get into situations like this? Jefferson was going to be the death of him. No one would ever trust him again if he freed a former British army intelligence officer, if he kept a slave he'd be a hypocrite, and he'd never leave John with Jefferson. No matter what he'd done in the past. He walked angrily back to his house, dragging John by the arm behind him.

John, for his part, didn't speak much. He accepted the switch in masters with fear and a little hope, but stumbled along behind Alexander as best he could manage. From what he could gather Jefferson had bet him in a game of poker, and this man, Alexander, knew who he was. Or rather, who he used to be.

He was led into a house much smaller than what he was used to, but still nice. There were papers and writings everywhere. Like no one had cleaned in ages. At very least he'd have something to do.

"I'll set you up a room for the night. Tomorrow I'll need to talk to Washington, so you'll need to join me for that, just try not to talk. People might not recognize your face on sight, but speak in your accent and you'll be dead meat. Understand?" Alexander took him to the kitchen and began heating up some leftovers. "I have a cook that comes in in the morning, if you let her know you're here she'll make you breakfast as well. Her name's Joanna by the way."

John nodded. "Yes master." He bowed his head obediently, waiting to be dismissed.

"And one more thing." Alexander forced John's chin up to look him in the eyes. "I don't believe in slavery. It's disgusting and immoral. But if anyone on this planet deserved it that person would be you." He stared a moment more, having to fight to keep his tough composure. Laurens was nothing like the ruthless fighter he'd once known. It was... unnerving. To say the least.

John nodded. "Of course master." He mumbled.

"Very well then. Here." He handed John a plate. "First door on the left. Don't touch anything, but there's a servant's bed in there you may sleep on. Leave the dish in the sink when you are finished." He ordered, taking a plate for himself and sitting down at the table, immediately taking up a quill and beginning to write.

After a few moments of waiting to be sure that was all, John carried his plate back to the room he'd been told and sat down on the pile of blankets that made up his bed. He didn't have much energy left, but he did his best to eat what he could before taking it back to the kitchen as directed.

Thankfully Alexander paid him no mind as he placed his plate into the sink as he'd been directed before hurrying back to the room. Curling up on the bed and keeping himself as silent as he could as he let himself sob.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexander learns just how powerful of a political mind John is
> 
> through one (horny) Aaron Burr

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if Aaron Burr isn't flirting with everyone then what's he even here for?

"Stay here and don't speak or do anything. Got it?" Alexander threatened, shoving John into a corner. "I'll be back in a bit." There wasn't anyone around but Hamilton and Washington, so he probably didn't need to worry about someone trying to talk to Laurens and he'd rather not have to bring him into Washington's office. Slave or not, he was still a former British officer.

John nodded, stepping back into the corner. He wasn't wearing any chains and Alexander had lent him some decent clothes so he'd blend in should anyone happen to drop by. "Yes, Master."

"Good, I'll return shortly," Alexender glared at him one last time before marching into Washington's office.

John nodded and leaned against the wall, readying himself to wait for quite awhile.

X X X X X X X X X X

"Are you feeling okay? If there's anything you need perhaps I could assist?"

John groaned, opening his eyes to see a man standing in front of him. He'd somewhat dozed off while leaning against the wall, so he hadn't seen him come up near him. "Um, no sir, thank you." Oh fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuck... John covered his mouth and blushed, "I.." He glanced around, trying to see if Alexander was anywhere near. He was in so much trouble...

"Aaron Burr," Burr introduced himself, holding out his hand. "You needn't be ashamed of the accent, many people picked it up. I won't judge, I promise." He winked

John nodded, putting his hand back down to his side. "I'm not sure if I should be talking to you, sir..."

"Well, there's no rules against me speaking to you, is there? You must be working for someone here then, if they told you not to talk to people. Probably just trying to keep you from accidentally giving anything away. I understand. Plus I suppose people probably aren't always nice about the accent and all. May I ask who you're here with? or is that top secret too?"

John hesitated, glancing around. "Well, if you won't tell him I spoke to you, then I'm here with Hamilton. He'll probably be out soon though," He said, hoping Burr would simply leave him alone.

"Ah, yes, Alexander and I fought together during the war, in fact. I wouldn't call us friends. Actually he doesn't like me all that much to be honest, but I assure you it's nothing to worry about. he always overreacts to things as I'm sure you've noticed."

"Well it's probably good for you he does, without his strategy in the battle of Yorktown, I doubt the states would have won the war," He said, momentarily forgetting he was supposed to be quiet. As much as he hated to admit it, Alexander had outsmarted him thoroughly. "Though, without so much infighting within the battalions I have believe Britain would have been bested much earlier and many lives could have been saved."

Burr nodded. "You're most likely correct, though I must admit I may have been apart of such infighting. I was more impulsive back then." He shrugged. "Studying law was quite a changing experience for me. Have you studied?"

"Yes, Law from Oxford, as well as Science and a bit of medicine at other schools. I had to stop when the war started and... well, anyway, what about you?" John blushed and looked down at his feet.

Burr smiled and stepped closer, brushing his hand against John's cheek. "You can tell me anything, I promise I won't tell."

"I'd appreciate if you'd keep your hands off of him, Burr," Alexander growled, grinding his teeth as he glared at the two of them.

John whimpered softly, trying not to freak out. "I- I'm sor-"

"Forgive me Alexander. I didn't mean any harm, honestly. He told me he wasn't supposed to speak to me and I was the one who pushed it. Besides, he didn't tell me anything important, we were just playing around a bit," Burr stepped towards Alex and smiled. "Don't go hard on him, okay? He didn't do anything."

Alexander frowned at him. "Whatever, it hardly matters anyway. Let's get out of here, Washington isn't going to do us any good." He huffed, grabbing Laurens's arm and dragging him back towards the exit.

"Alex, darling, really you mustn't punish him, it was my fault and besides, I did the talking, the only thing he said was about his education. I doubt that's highly secret information," Burr argued, stepping in front of Alexander and crossing his arms. "What? Are you scared to have people know you've employed someone from Britain? So are half the people here, they just lost their accent. It's nothing to be mad about and it's not going to hurt you. I would think as an immigrant yourself you'd have more compassion."

"That's not what this is about, alright? Now would you leave? I have business to attend to." Alexander pushed him out of the way and kept dragging John along with him.

Burr sighed. "Fine. Be like that, see what I care." He shrugged and stormed off.

X X X X X X X X X X

"I never learned his name. The man from yesterday." Burr grabbed Hamilton's arm as he walked past. "I'm trying to draft an idea and I was wondering if you'd allow him to assist me. I think he's just the mind I'm looking for."

Alexander sighed and turned to look at him. "No. He's not going to work for you, alright? Now drop it."

"May I at least ask him? Alexander, you're not allowing him enough leeway to learn and work on new ideas, I hope you know that. Do you have any idea what he could do if you let him?"

Alexander growled softly. "I thought he didn't tell you anything. Now you're trying to tell me he's a genius. Pick a lie, Burr. Besides, you've never believed in anything before, why believe in him?"

Burr huffed and stepped forward, staring him in the eyes. "I hope you know that he looks up to you. He thinks you basically won the war. He may be wrong about that, but he still believes in you. And he did everything he could to do what you said. I hope you know how lucky you are," He muttered, stepping away and rolling his eyes.

"He..." Alexander watched as Burr left and tried to process that. Laurens really thought all of that? Or was Burr just lying to him as usual? He'd left the slave at home with his housekeeper to help her out while he worked on his debt plan outside of his house, but now he wished he could speak to him to verify that.

He groaned and ran after Burr. "What's the project you're working on?"

Burr grinned and stopped walking. "I'm working on a budget plan that will ensure we can afford both a military and academic research. It seems that those are both things that he is interested in, am I correct?"

"I... I suppose. Military particularly," Alexander sighed, "Look, Burr, I know you and I haven't always seen eye to eye, but I may need help with something. If you can assist me then I'll be sure to let John help you with your budget plan and anything else for that matter."

"Anything," Burr smiled, "But I must admit I'm surprised you came to me of all people."

Alexander grabbed his arm and led him back to his office, locking the door behind them and checking to be sure it was empty. "Washington couldn't help me. I need to know that you can keep this a secret. Completely secret."

"My lips are sealed, of course." Burr sat down in one of the nicer guest chairs and smiled. "Now what is it that you're so worried about?"

"Laurens. John Laurens. Do you know what that is? I'm assuming you never met him face to face." Alex took a seat across from Burr. "You swore you'd keep this a secret already."

Burr stared at him for a second before it dawned on him. "That... that man was John Laurens? The genius military planner for the British? Oh you've got to be kidding me.." Burr groaned and put his face into his hand and sighed. "But wasn't he part of the program that Thomas backed? Taking their leaders and-"

"That's the point. He's a slave, Burr. Jefferson tricked me! Now I can't free him and I can't keep him and I can't sell him! It was all perfectly legal too so there's nothing I can fight him for. My only other option was leaving him with Jefferson and no one deserves that... There's nothing I can do!" Alexander huffed. "That's why I was so mad at him for speaking to you last night. i wasn't sure how much he told you."

Burr nodded. "I understand. I... may have a suggestion, actually, but it might still be a bit of a tarnish on your reputation."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's Burr's plan? (Someone give that man a boyfriend please) I already know of course, but I definitely left all of that out because of plot purposes and suspense
> 
> definitely


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I do love putting gays on boats ;) anyway, enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LAFAYETTE!
> 
> (also, the reason Alex is going to Britain in this is because congress is still negotiating what to do with and between the country and just how much control they have. Alex is bringing John to show that he's on America's side now so he can eventually free him without consequence)

"And you're sure no one will see him?" Alexander frowned. He was standing on the docks next to Laurens and Burr waiting for a ship headed to Britain. Not particularly how he'd wanted his day to go, but it would work out. Probably.

Burr nodded. "You'll need to keep him in your room until you get to Britain, then you'll have to convince people he's on our side now. Also, John, I know this is probably hard for you, but we need you to do this. If we can pull it off properly you might be able to go back to your home in Britain and Alex can dump this whole mess once and for all."

"I know and I don't mind, I just wanna see my family again," John sighed. The ship was pulling up to dock and they needed to get on before anyone else gathered and went aboard. "When we get back I'll help you with your budget mister Burr, I promise. Thank you." He couldn't wait to see his daughter again. It had been forever.

Alexander smiled and took his hand. "Alright. Wish us luck Burr." Hell knew they'd need it.

X X X X X X X X X

It didn't take long to get boarded. There was almost no one except for the crew members and a few political allies from France who were either visiting or running. John wasn't really sure what the situation there was, but he mostly just tried to stay out of everyone's way.

"There's books in here for you. I'll make sure to bring you something to eat later. Just... try and keep quiet. We don't need anyone wandering in here," Alexander warned, putting down his trunk and looking around the room. There was only one bed and it was a small room altogether, but they'd figure it out. "I'll get some extra bedding so we can make you a bed on the floor I guess."

John nodded and took a book off the shelf. It was some fiction piece he didn't recognize, but it didn't matter. They had a long journey ahead of them. Almost six weeks in total if the weather was nice.

"I'm going to get some work done with an associate, I'll see you soon. Got it?" Alex couldn't help but break a smile as he watched John mumble a yes as he let himself get absorbed in the book. No, he... This man murdered men on the battlefield and fought against everything he stood for. He wasn't /cute/, he was fucking dangerous.

The door slammed shut, making John jump slightly, not expecting that. Had he done something wrong?

X X X X X X X X X

"Alexander, dear, I believe you have a political enemy sleeping on your bed. I don't mean to judge, but what the fuck." Lafayette stared down at the sleeping figure he'd fought with several times on the battlefield. He'd recognize this man anywhere. Even if he was a lot skinnier now. Softer, perhaps, but he was sleeping while clutching Alexander's jacket to his chest. Brown curls framing his freckled face. "He's kind of cute when he's not trying to kill me, you know."

Alexander rolled his eyes. "Of course you would think that. Could you stop drooling over him for a minute? We need to figure out how to convince everyone he's on our side outside of just marching around with him and having him work with us on political issues. We need the public to trust him and that's not going to be easy."

"Relax! Mon ami, we have weeks to think about that, relax! Besides, it interests me that you're bothering with this instead of just giving him back to Jefferson."

"No one deserves that, Laf, not even him. And if anyone deserved it then it would be him. We both know first hand what he's capable of," Alexander reminded, glancing over to make sure John was still asleep. "Look, I've done everything I can to abolish slavery and there's nothing I want to do less than be a part of it. As much as I'd like to see him behind bars, I'd rather him walk free in Britain than serve as a slave in America. It may not be exactly right, but it's better than leaving him with Jefferson. Or anyone else for that matter," He sighed and smiled down at John. "You're right though; he is kinda cute like this." He smiled.

Lafayette grinned. "Well I'm glad I could help you realize that, but I think I'm going to retreat to my own chambers for some tea. I promise to drop back by later and check up on you two lovebirds." He winked playfully and left before Alexander could protest.

"Jerk," Alexander muttered, slumping onto the floor, leaning back against the bed and listening to John breathe.

He sighed. He needed to work on his debt plan while he had the time. This trip was going to pretty much kill him and he might have to try again the next year if they didn't get this done quickly enough. Damn congress. Stupid pretty Laurens. Fucking Jefferson.

Mostly fuck Jefferson. That asshole.

X X X X X X X X X X

Gunshots. The sound was the first thing John recognized as his vision remained blurry. He could smell gunpowder and blood as he wiped his eyes and tried to bring everything back into focus. Where was he?

"Focus! Laurens, we need you to fight!" Someone he barely recognized shoved a gun into his hands, already loaded.

Right. John blinked and shook his head. "Yeah, thanks," He muttered, "I'm alright, thank you." Gunfire whisked around him as he rose out of the trench and fired. Something about this felt wrong. Unnerving. The colony army was quickly approaching and men were falling all around him. Somehow he remained unhit even though he was standing in the middle of a battlefield with soldiers running past him on all sides. What was going on?

"You're right, he is kind of cute like this."

What? John frowned and turned to the owner of the voice. Hamilton? What was he doing? And who was he talking to? "Hey stop-!"

Alexander grabbed him and pulled him forward, pressing their lips together with a special sort of tenderness he wasn't used to. This couldn't be real.

John couldn't help but kiss back. It was a dream anyway, who cared?

"Good boy~" Alexander purred and pulled him closer, pushing him back down onto the bed of their cabin.

Wait-

Where they were didn't really matter anyway, did it? 

Alexander chuckled and kissed his forehead. "Laurens, you need to wake up," He whispered, gently shaking John. "Wake up."

"Wake up."

"You wake up," John muttered, groaning as he opened his eyes. Hamilton wasn't smiling at him anymore, but he wasn't exactly frowning so he supposed he couldn't complain. "S-sorry master, I didn't mean to talk back," He apologized.

Alexander nodded and set down a tray of food. "Well I brought you dinner and thought you might want to know you have your own bed now." He jerked his thumb toward the floor where a pile of blankets had been laid out for him. "I'm going to a meeting. You can leave the dishes on the counter, I'll bring them down to the kitchen later."

"Alright. I'll be here then. Waiting." John sighed and got off the bed to eat his dinner. What just happened? He was... He couldn't have dreamed about kissing Alex. Alexander was his enemy, not his lover. Maybe a friend if he was pushing things. His master.

And he was dreaming of kissing him instead of shooting him.

What kind of sappy idiot was he?

X X X X X X X X X

"Stay safe my love," His wife whispered, kissing him gently as her strength slowly left her. "Take care of Francis. Keep her safe and away from the war, promise me. Promise me you'll keep her away from the way, John."

John nodded, clasping her hand tightly. "Of course darling," He pressed her hand to his lips and sighed, "I promise. I swear to you, she'll be safe. I won't fight anymore."

The war ended a matter of weeks after so it hardly mattered. His daughter stayed with his father most of the time while he worked, so when the letter arrived that he was being given to an American official as part of the peace treaty it made sense that he gave her to him to stay and grow up.

Grow up without him.

"It's time to go, John," Alex shook him awake gently. "Laurens?"

John groaned and opened his eyes, Alex replacing the faces of his past as the fog of his memory faded. "I'm up."

"Good, let's get going," Alex dragged him up and out the door, his trunk already having been brought ashore to wait for him, "There's a meeting this morning and we need to not be late."

John nodded and slipped into his coat as he stumbled behind Alex, trying his best to keep up with him. The sunlight was nearly blinding as he walked out of the cabin for the first time in weeks. He almost fell over as he walked down the ramp onto solid ground and immediately heard shouting.

"Lock him up!"

"You filthy scum!"

Someone pushed him to the ground before he could do anything and Alex pulled him back, not saying anything about the comments.

"Daddy!"

That one caught his attention. John turned to see his daughter, taller than he remembered now and more determined, pushing her way though the crowd and calling for him.

"Daddy!" She screamed, pushing to hug him before anyone could stop her. "You're back! You're home!"

John smiled and knelt down, pulling her into a hug. He knew she needed to leave, but he couldn't help himself. This was his baby girl. "Francis, darling. You need to go find your grandfather. Go home, I'm sorry, but you can't stay with me," He whispered, noticing everyone was staring at them. "Go find your grandfather sweetie."

Alex stared down at John, shaking softly. John....

John had a daughter?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooo, anyone remember that John Laurens had a daughter? (I'm gonna say she's around 6-7 in this story) Because I love soft family man John just saying
> 
> also, idk how is wife died, but I figure some sickness bc that was the shit back then


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John attends the meeting and ends up going off on the man he once called king

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ChArAcTeR DeVeLoPeMeNt!!!

John could feel every eye on him as he took his seat next to Alexander. He knew damn well he didn't belong there. At least on the American side of this debate, but he'd do what he needed to to get back to his daughter. Even defend these idiots.

"This is ridiculous!" King George hissed, slamming his fist down on his desk. "Have you not taken enough from us? And now you want to take what little money we have. Next week it will be our armies, leaving us defenseless, or our land and leave my people homeless!"

"We only seek compensation for the unjust taxation that you forced on the colonies! You left us penniless and vulnerable, it's only just that we want a good start as a nation," Washinton argued back. "We take what is just to take and nothing more!"

George laughed and gestured to Laurens. "Is that what you call 'just'? Forcing my people into slavery and flaunting them in my face? I'm sure you have perfectly sound reasoning behind that, of course," He sneered, "You want more money? Why don't you tax your own people? Be a leader and stop forcing it out of other countries."

Washington sighed. "Look, I'm sure we can come to an agreement about all of this. If you agree to send us the funding then we can talk about removing that program and freeing the officers affected."

"I'm not giving you more money, Washington and if you were half of a man you wouldn't have allowed good men to be enslaved by your own cabinet. Talk big all you like, you're as bad as any of the scum you picked up."

Alexander stood up, growling under his breath. "How dare you speak to him like th-!"

"Shut up!" John shouted, startling everyone including himself. "You have no right to say anything like that! You leach off your own subjects just to make yourself richer and then when they were starving on the streets you simply turned to the colonies for a new source of income. And how dare you?! Talking about the 'good men' being enslaved. What about the men you enslave every day? Don't pretend to be against slavery when you own slaves, the only difference is the color of our skin! I'm no better than any of them, so with all due respect your majesty, find something else to bitch about." He turned red, realizing what he'd just done as he sank back down into his seat and tried to not look like he was dying inside. Fuck, Hamilton was going to kill him.

King George glared at him. "Glad to see you've got my men barking like dogs for you as well," He huffed, "Keep him then, I'm still not going to give you money. This meeting is over. I won't listen to this nonsense any longer."

Alexander gripped John's arm harshly, leaning in to whisper to him. "Go back to the room. Don't talk to anyone, I'll meet you there later and we can discuss this there."

Right. John nodded and slipped out of the room, avoiding eye contact even as he knew everyone was staring at him. What had he just done? Alexander was so going to kill him...

X X X X X X X X X X X

"Mister Hamilton!" A man panted and ran after him in the hallway, forcing Alex to turn and look at him. "I wanted to speak with you for a moment."

"You have my attention. Is there anything I can help you with?"

The man bent over a bit to catch his breath. He was a bit older, probably military, but not someone Alexander had met before. "My Name is Charles Lee, I used to work with Laurens during the war. I uh... I came to request that you not hurt him. He's a sweet kid, really, he's just got a big mouth on him. He's never meant any harm to anyone, especially not to you sir. If you could just go easy on him, please? If there's anything I can do, I-"

"What do you mean," Alexander interrupted, "'Especially not me'? Mister Lee, John was a military strategist and commanding officer, meaning harm was kind of his job. Now I don't know who you are or why you think it's your business to come here and beg me not to hurt Laurens, but I assure you that if Mister Laurens wished harm upon anyone it would be me, whether now or while we were fighting against each other. And no, there is nothing you can do, he's said plenty enough for both of you."

Lee sighed. "John looks up to you, you know. He'd never admit it to your or to anyone else through his own means, but he thinks you're brilliant. For what reason, I may never know, but he does. Might make sense if you ever acted worthy of it too," He grumbled, crossing his arms. "I came here to tell you that as much as I dislike him, and God knows I despise the man, he's smart and he's kind and for some reason, he thinks you're not as half-witted as the rest of your 'American' government, so don't hurt him. Half the men in Britain would gladly give their lives for him and half the women too. Don't think he couldn't leave you if he wanted." And with that Charles left, turning on his heel and marching off to leave Alexander wondering what had just happened.

Burr had mentioned that John talked about him like he looked up to him and admittedly, Alex was beginning to believe it, but this was getting ridiculous. Besides, if John actually gave half a shit about him he should bring it up himself.

Alexander sighed and turned back to the door he stood in front of. The room he and John were staying in.

Dammit, he couldn't hurt him. The point of this trip was to make people believe that John was on the American's side now and nothing could've made that more believable than what happened that morning. No matter how out of line that was.

As soon as he stepped through the door John stood up from the bed. "I'm sorry sir, I-" He whimpered as Alexander held up his hand.

"I'm not mad at you. Well, I'm mad. That was totally out of line, but I'm not going to punish you, alright?" Alex smiled gently. "In all honesty, you probably helped our case with convincing people you're on our side. You don't have to be scared, okay?" He wrapped his arm around Laurens, noticing he was shaking. "Is everything okay?"

John nodded, staring down at his feet. "I just- I'm sorry, I think I need to sit down. Alexander, what if he hurts my family? I just yelled at the king of Britain, Frances could be hurt..."

Alexander nodded, slowly understanding his reasoning. "I'll do what I can, okay? I won't let him take anything out on your daughter. I promise, John."

"Alexander?" John mumbled.

"Hmm?"

John hesitated. "Why are you being so nice to me? I mean, I fought against you in the war. You hated me the first time we met, I almost thought you were going to kill me even, but you're helping me. Why?"

"I..." Alexander bit his tongue, remembering what both Lee and Burr had said about John. "I suppose you haven't given me any reason not to. We both did things during the war that we wouldn't in normal situations, I don't blame you for any of it. I do have one question though because both Burr and one Charles Lee have talked to me about something and I'd like to know from your own mouth if it's true or not."

"Lee talked to you?" John flushed, "About me? What did he- He didn't say anything bad did he?"

"No, nothing bad. Why? Oh uh, what I meant to ask you was, well Aaron and Charles both insisted that you.. looked up to me, in a way. Admired me. You don't have to- I just want to know if that's true. From you, not anyone else."

John sighed. "You're a brilliant man, Alexander. Of course, I admire you, you've done things I could only dream of doing. We may have been on opposing sides of this war, but there's a lot I agree with you on. I'm against slavery, just like you, I admire your strategies both military and political. Yes, I admire you. You're incredible."

"Thank you," It was Alex's turn to blush as he accepted the compliment. "I... I hope that I am worthy of that praise."

"You are," John didn't hesitate, "And thank you, you've helped me so much."

Alexander sighed, shaking his head softly. "Really, thank you. I- Well, I've got to go find Washington, I just wanted you to know that you're not in trouble, okay?"

John nodded, smiling gently.

He was so fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I guess in this Charles Lee was also a British officer (because I'm American and don't know wtf was going on in Britain or who officers were there) and he and Laurens did still have a duel, Laurens still shot him, but he didn't die (Medical help yo) and now just grumbles about how painfully gay John is for Alex


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft Dad™ Laurens anyone?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, this is the last chapter and I'm sorry. I don't know where to go from here and I feel like my writing on it has gotten kind of ooc, but I wanted to give you an ending of sorts instead of abandoning it on the last chapter :/

"I apologize for the late hour, sir, I hope you don't mind," Alexander apologized, smiling softly as John greeted his daughter.

Henry Laurens nodded curtly. "You seem to own enough of mine, why not my home and grandchild as well? By all means, take this place over like you American scum seem to do with everything."

Alexander sighed, saying nothing about that comment. This was about John getting to see his daughter again, not his own pride. No matter what Henry said.

"Father!" John hissed, picking up his daughter. "Alexander has been nothing but kind to me, you have no right to treat him like this."

"He's on my property, I'll say what I want about it all. Pardon me if I don't wish to be overly friendly with the man who openly flaunts the fact that he defiles my own son. Did you ever imagine the shame that has brought on me? Do what you must if you want to be in his favor, but do NOT bring him here, understand? I don't want to see either of your faces any longer," He was obviously infuriated with all of it, making John clutch Frances closer.

Alexander struggled not to say anything as he went over to take John's arm. "We should leave."

"I can't leave Frances with him," John glared at his father, who glared back just as strongly.

"Alright then," It was going to be hell trying to figure out what to do with a child in tow, but at this point, it hardly mattered as long as they got home safely, "We'll take her with us then, but we need to go."

John didn't move, just staring at his father. Did he really believe that Alexander and he were... Even if anything were going on between them, John would hardly call it 'defiling'. Alex would never.

"John, we need to- Mm!"

John pulled him in for a kiss, tugging him closer with one arm as he held his daughter in the other. Fuck, it felt good to finally do that. He grinned and pulled him back for another only a second after they pulled apart. Alex was kissing him back by the time their lips pressed together the second time and it was the most glorious thing he'd felt in his life.

"Get out of my house!" Henry shouted, infuriated, "I don't care if we're related, no son of mine would fraternize with a man like that, an American no less. Get out!"

Alexander was still in a haze, realizing that John had kissed him. Willingly, at that. He didn't even realize he was being dragged outside or the tears streaming down John's face as they stepped out into the darkness.

"Daddy?" Frances whimpered, tucking her face into her father's collar.

"It's okay, princess. Everything is okay, your grandfather is just upset right now. It's fine." He said it more for his own benefit than hers, but either way, it was all a lie. Nothing was fine.

Alex shook himself out of his haze. "You kissed me?"

"I've thought I made it clear enough how I feel about you, Alexander, but if not I'd gladly state so again; I admire you, strongly. I-" Stop fucking around, John, just say it. "I love you. My father never liked me all that much, so I married a woman of his choosing, but I love you, Alexander. I don't want to leave you. I want to take my daughter and come back with you to America. I don't care if people turn me away or shame me for what I've done, I want to help you. With anything you need."

"John..." He whispered softly, stepping forward to gently take the two of them in his arms. "I- I don't want you to leave," He whispered, pressing a kiss to John's forehead, "I love you, John."

**Author's Note:**

> kinda short for now, but it was an idea I had and would like to write some more :)


End file.
